It's been three weeks today. Three weeks since my husband and I took steps to go into lock-down at home, in order to prevent him (and to a lesser extent, I) from being exposed to COVID-19, or Coronavirus. It wasn't so much a choice - it was a necessity. With my husband's medical history and current condition, he was immunosusceptible and I will not risk him. So we adopted social distancing before many others did. As an introvert, this was not overly difficult for me. First, I work from home regularly, and have for many years. My husband and dog are also used to me working from home, so it was not a difficult leap for them either. Second, I enjoy my time at home and am lucky enough to have married my best friend. Third, I already have severe anxiety issues with crowds, so staying physically away from people is my MO. But with all that said, when I read the news today that Ohio's Governor was extending our "Stay at Home" order to May 1st, I went through an intense period of emotional upheaval. The only thing I could compare it to would be grief. Understand, it isn't that I disagree with the order. I'm all for more protections here, rather than letting loose and having a flood of new infections. But the announcement hit me, like when it hits you that you have lost a loved one. The finality and reality of it. And when it hit, it hit hard. I struggled the rest of the day to focus, drowning myself in work tasks that did not require a lot of critical thinking but were still important to complete. I struggled on calls where people were checking in and talking about their personal experiences. I avoided social media, from experience, but could not avoid the push notifications from my phone. News story after news story, every one worse than the last. So what did I do? I shut down. Now, a little background: 2017 was a very bad year for my family. We lost some very vital family members who had lived long and celebrated lives. But it was loss after loss. After the last tramatic experience with my maternal grandmother passing in the same year as my paternal grandmother, I knew I was in serious mental and emotional trouble. I reached out to a grief counselor, and was lucky enough to find an excellent resource and sounding block. He taught me many coping methods for grief, and while I feel I might have stopped seeing him too early, I was able to emerge from 2017 a strong and healthier, if changed, person. I've also had the benefit of an excellent action-oriented therapist a couple years ago. With her help, I was able to relieve some of the PTSD side effects from a tramatic accident, and utilize techniques and tricks to handle my panic and anxiety disorders. But shutting down is not a tactic that either counselor would have recommended. It took me some time, working slowly through the phases of grief this afternoon. I had to remind myself to be patient. It is not a race and I have to work with the time and space my mind allows me to. So, I began the slow ascent out of the depression, towards the light of acceptance. I was greatly helped by the distraction of Animal Crossing, an amazingly therapeutic video game that my husband had wisely purchased for me when he saw me suffering. The point of this post is: You are not alone. You should be patient with yourself and let yourself grieve. Even if you are grieving the cancellation of an event that is important to you, or the loss of spending time with family for an important birthday. It's important to listen to your mind and body - understand what you need and that that need may just be time.
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Tips and Tricks For social butterflies, extroverts and anyone craving social time:
For focus time:
Distractions:
Physical Health:
Mental Health:
So what questions do you have? Let's bring back crinolines... (or how to social-distance yourself and maintain your mental health)3/15/2020 When you are a fan of history and historical fiction like I am, you find refuge in what you know. And in this case, it is how to practice social distancing and personal space with the cunning use of fashion (for example, crinolines). So let's level-set. It is the Ides of March, 2020. There is a global pandemic of the novel coronavirus and it has killed many people. I live in the United States, and my state alone has many confirmed cases. Our governor has closed all schools and universities, is closing restaurants and bars tonight at 9 PM, and has limited all social gatherings to below 100 people. Disney and Universal have closed their theme parks. Our local zoo, aquarium and libraries are closed. Air travel from many countries has been banned. Most companies have sent home workers to work from home or take paid leave for a few weeks. Grocery stores have become desolate wastelands and price-gauging is being legally pursued as opportunists look to make a quick buck. Sounds like fiction, right? It is not. It is our reality. General advise to avoid contracting this virus is to practice good cleaning habits (wash your hands), avoid touching your face and practice social distancing. And for most, this last term is new. But I'm an introvert book nerd, so social distancing is not a mystery to me. But, for the record, social distancing is a conscious effort to reduce close contact between people and hopefully stymie community transmission of a virus. It is practiced by staying home and not coming within a few feet of others outside the household. I don't want to dwell too much on what this means for the community, but here is a link to a great article in The Atlantic: www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2020/03/coronavirus-what-does-social-distancing-mean/607927/ Now crinolines (a petticoat made of horsehair fabric and later, metal spring hoops) were not created for social distancing - but they did have that side effect. If you have skirts that can reach ten yards wide, you can be sure that women in the 1800s had their own personal bubble. So I say - bring back the crinolines! All joking aside, social distancing at this moment in time is critical to minimize the spread of the pandemic. But this also creates a host of problems for people unaccustomed of extended alone time. Mental health care is going to be especially important in this time filled with stress and anxiety. So here are some tips from numerous sources to help those who are stuck in their homes:
These are just some ideas. Each person is an individual and must do what they can to find their inner peace. Be safe, be healthy. Take care of yourself and your loved ones - things will get better with awareness and vigilance. |
AuthorStar Wars madness, book reviews, Austen love and all around nerdiness. Human rights warrior and advocate of self-care. ArchivesCategories |